Dealing with a breakup is never easy, especially if you expected to spend the rest of your life with your partner. Divorce or a breakup with a short-term boyfriend is never the same. Every breakup is unique. And nobody ever said breaking up is easy. 

Any type of breakup can be hard to deal with even if it wasn’t a long-term thing.

Even if your ex is alive it can still feel like they’re no longer on the planet and it can hurt just as bad as if they crossed over to somewhere else. 

Having your heart broken can happen if your ex is breathing fine, and living life as usual, it can hurt even worse than if they died or they were a toxic partner. 

Because you know your ex is choosing not to be with you on purpose

You can’t really talk to your ex the way you used to after a breakup. In some cases, the person you fell in love with might never have existed at all. Your partner could have been a fantasy all along. This can cause serious depression.

Living with a fantasy partner is the hardest part of breaking up because it’s mostly in your head

Whether it’s the relationship, the company, the person, or the potential that you mourn, the reaction is all the same: you’ll feel heartbroken. The grieving process can take a while, and to a point, it’s unavoidable. However, there are things you can do to soften the blow that comes with a breakup loss. These tips below have been known to help people get themselves ready for a happy healthy relationship. 

Take off the ultra-thick rose-tinted glasses.

Hard as it may be at first, you need to take a look at things with an objective eye. It’s easy to view your ex with rose-tinted glasses, because that’s just what nostalgia does. The thing is, your time together wasn’t always that easy. The perfect person doesn’t exist, even if they can pretend they’re perfect pretty well. 

Still feeling nostalgic? Try this….

Think of all the annoying things that you had to deal with when you were with your ex. Think of all the gross things they did, the stupid TV shows they liked, and the awful way they picked their teeth at the table. Don’t miss them that much anymore, do you? 

This can especially be a good tool to use if you have a friend getting divorced and want to help. 

It’s time to do all the things your ex hated (that you ALWAYS wanted to do!) 

Every couple, even the most compatible ones, have clashes when it comes to certain lifestyle preferences. These preferences tend to be things we silently give up when we’re with them, just so that we don’t upset them. 

Maybe he wasn’t a fan of that one incense you absolutely adore. Or maybe it was the way he always complained about your hair being that one color, or that one dish you adore but he can’t stand. You know the clash that I’m talking about. Do them, and you’ll be surprised how much better you feel. This makes is easier to get over being broken up with.

Go out and get wild with friends

Did you ever notice how many people tend to forget about their friends when they’re coupled up? It’s a very real phenomenon and it hurts a lot of friendships. This is especially true if you were in a relationship where your ex didn’t approve of certain friends.

Having people around you, blowing off steam, and actively reaching out to people will help you mend friendships and also reconnect with yourself. Besides, who doesn’t enjoy hanging out with friends? 

Reach out for some talk therapy

If you go on any online forum for relationship advice, they’ll tell you that most people will recommend therapy after a breakup. In fact, the vast majority of people will recommend that you get therapy whenever your relationship hits the skids. There’s a good reason for this.

A qualified therapist will help you understand aspects of your relationship that you might not have been fully aware of. Good therapy can also help you learn how to process grief better, which in turn, can help shorten your grieving period. 

Hit the gym

Another common advice snippet that you’ve probably seen online is to renew your membership to the local gym. This is another cliche bit of advice that has been proven to work. Getting back into shape offers several perks that can help you get over your heartbreak. 

First, exercise releases feel-good hormones called endorphins that help relieve bad feelings, boost mood, and lower stress. Second, it can help you get a “revenge body” or just boost your self-esteem through the improvements you see in your physique. Third, it offers a constructive outlet for your anger.

A Final Note

You might feel like your heartbreak is going to last for eternity, but bad as it may feel, the sadness won’t last forever. Eventually, you will be able to move on from the loss you have. In most cases, breakups happen for a good reason—even if the reason itself is not easily visible at first. 

The thing is, you need to give yourself time to heal. Trying to replace your ex too soon or trying to bottle up your emotions is only going to harm you more. So, don’t rush yourself. Let the feelings happen, then do what you can to move on. It’s normal to hurt, and it’s okay to embrace that side of your life as well. And we invite you to join our private heartbreak support group for women!