Making a man want you sexually, is the easy part of attraction—But you are probably wondering how do I make a good man want me for the long term? Attracting a man is the easy part. You can dress sexy, smile, touch his arm when you don’t need to and flirt, but the big burning question is… how do attract a man in a big way? How do I make a guy want to be with me forever?

1. Get Clear On What You Want.

crystal ball
This is a huge part of using the Law of Attraction and getting a lasting relationship. Because if you aren’t quite sure that you want a relationship for the long term you will get a dishwater murky response from the universe. So if you really want a long-term marriage or someone to walk off into the sunset with, you have to make sure that really is what you want. Do you want long-term right now? Are you really ready this week? Or Is next month really better?

It’s also much better to be alone— than to wish you were alone. I’ve been in a situation like that before shortly after my divorce. I met a man who was a fabulous kisser and I thought he was the bee’s knees. I started going to therapy, (which was fabulous by the way), and I told my therapist about my new exciting beau.

She asked me if I had a list. I said, “What do you mean?”

She replied, “A list of what you want in a partner.”

I had never heard of such a thing.

So, I respected her and her wisdom immensely, so I dutifully went home and got out my pen and a new journal. I started writing an epically long list. It had 40 things on it. And my current boyfriend only met 4 out of 40 of the traits I wanted in a partner.

That was only 10%!

10% is not enough for a relationship to be solid and fantastic like I wanted. Heck, 10% isn’t even enough to have a mediocre relationship— And I had already been there, done that.

So here comes the next very important part of the attracting a good solid man equation.

2. Set Your Intentions.

What exactly are intentions, anyway? Intentions are the starting point of your dreams. Intentions are what you set inside of your mind and your energy, so you can get EXACTLY what you want in a completely satisfying relationship.

These intentions you set are the seed of the solidly rooted relationship that you want. And it starts with you putting it out there.

Take a couple minutes to breathe and get into the flow first, so you can get tapped into the highest part of yourself and your desires.

Then, ask yourself some questions.

What do I want my life to be like in the next 3 years?

What do I want my partner to be like?

What are the traits that are really important to me in a relationship? Family? Politics? Children? Financial responsibility? Alcohol consumption? Religion? Generous tipper? Wants sex three times a day or once a week? Does he like to communicate about problems? Or shove them under the rug and pretend they never happened— like you do? Does he like the beach or the city? Is he ripped? Or are you OK with the “Dad bod”?

Write them down.  and be as specific as you want— As long as you don’t have any negative emotions come up about the specifics.

If you start to go down the rabbit hole, keep them more general.

If any negative emotions come up, come back to center, focus on your breath and try to relax again. You can stop where you are, and write them down once you feel better.

Don’t set your intentions when you are feeling bad, because you would be coming from a place of lack, and this won’t help your wishes come to you any faster.

After you set your intentions, release them to the ever-expanding consciousness of the universe, God, or whatever you like to call it. Act as if you already have what you want (He is DEFINITELY out there, you just don’t know where he is yet), because the universe hears you and will be creating the perfect circumstances for your paths to cross.

3. Feel As Good As You Can As Much As Possible.

If you get down in the dumps— as we all do, figure out whatever you can do to get to a better feeling place. Like attracts like and when you are feeling good it is easier for the universe to send you a man that is in a good place himself and is a perfect match for you.

And if you get in a funk, do not… I repeat… do not beat yourself up about it. You need contrast to get more clear on what you want.

If you meet a man who doesn’t call when he says he will help you gain the clarity that you want a man who will call you every day on his way home from work.

4. Appreciate Not Getting What You Want (Right Now)

I’m sure you have been at a point sometime in your life when you didn’t get what you wanted. We’ve ALL been there. If we always got what we wanted all the time— there would be nothing to desire. Esther Hicks calls this contrast.

Contrast is a beautiful thing. Every time you don’t get what you want, you can see the opposite— you can see what it is that you really really really want. And only then can you see the other side of the coin with total clarity.

What if you met Prince Charming the week after he broke up with his girlfriend? He wouldn’t be ready to have a long-term girlfriend, but he might be ready to play the field then, and that isn’t what you really want, is it?

If you meet your perfect man at the wrong time, things won’t work out.

You can’t control divine timing. It is part of the process. If you meet this man a year down the road, he WILL have had time to heal and he will be ready for you— and you will be ready too.

Wouldn’t’ you rather wait a little longer to connect with your life partner when you are both feeling ready, willing and able for a REAL relationship? Wouldn’t it be worth the wait?

5. Don’t Be Attached To The Outcome

You can be open to something different— something even better than you expected. The universe IS conspiring to shower you will blessings if you are open to letting go of control and going with the flow and letting things come to you, (instead of chasing after them).

Your partner might not look like the man you expect to be your soul-mate either. He might be shorter, taller, or even more handsome than you ever imagined.

Open your heart, let the universe handle the details, pay attention, and look for synchronicities all around you. Because when you notice synchronistic happenings popping up in front of you, it’s the universe smiling— and letting you know that you are on the right path— and love is on the way.